1. |
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2. |
Stars Afar!
01:41
|
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We set sail for adventure
Or close facsimile!
The finest lies
our gold can buy
It’s Stars Afar for me!
For thrills, excitement, peril
No finer place to be!
Don’t worry, guys,
it’s supervised!
It’s Stars Afar for me!
Creature comforts go so far, but we want thrills
What’s so wrong with wanting them to come with frills?
Let’s take it to the limit
Of taste, of decency!
Face storm and squall, then gala ball!
It’s Stars Afar for me!
We scrub and cook and grovel
They act like they don’t see
The nasty fact, it’s all an act
Makes this cruise suck for me
Their manufactured exploits
Make us the exploitees
They think they pay to live the way
We do, but hell is free
Hands on deck and hand-in-foot, they bark and beck
If you’re so keen on roughing it, you scrub the deck
Our fearless captain beckons
Oh, what could his news be?
He’ll strategize!
Here come more lies!
It’s Stars Afar for me!
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3. |
Widdleton's March
00:53
|
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And now the man whose fearless gumption leaves us all in awe
A noble pilot, our assumption: many wars he saw
But either way the pins and medals strewn across his chest
His perfect hair and upright air have rendered us impressed
No finer fellow we’d request to lead us through the stars
His barrel chest, his suits so pressed, he plays a mean guitar
We’d follow blindly anywhere, with sword, or pissul-drun
Stand up straight and flat your palm,
He's here: It's Widdleton!
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4. |
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We’ll bring the beast to slaughter
For fame, for infamy
Do as I say, live one more day.
Now, Apogee: to me!
That’s showmanship, I tell you.
What’s next? Can’t wait to see
The pics we’ll take, thank God it’s fake!
It’s Stars Afar for me!
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5. |
I Fold
03:23
|
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When I was just a boy — or, more of a boy
I dreamt I’d be a hero: a real McCoy
I’d jet from star to star and serve the hoi polloi
A hero bold. With tales to be told
And now — look at me! I fold!
I hand out towels and sheets
To cruise guests a century old
I fold!
They promised a promotion, and maybe a raise
More responsibilities, but still no sick days
One day I’ll head up whites, but for now it’s the grays
That’s fine! No reason to whine!
I’m doing great! I give! I give!
I give nice folks fresh linens and a smile, oh what a way to live!
I was athletic and smart. I had a penchant for art
And my hopes were higher than high!
These towels are two minutes late!
While you’re here, take my plate!
I rolled over — and up — to the sky!
Garrplunk yubble dee blump!
Thanks! You, too, Missus Glump!
What’s your name? I don’t see a tag!
You aren’t getting a tip!
And don’t give us no lip!
Oh, how fun, to wave the white flag!
One day, I packed it in
Gave a shrug, got a grin
Herter ern gug reppito gunkle
What’d that guy say to me?
Who, him?
Yes, you dummy!
Said you look a bit like his uncle
What?
Uncle!
What?
Uncle!
WHAT?
UNCLE!
I’m doing all right, I throw in the towel
Give up the gun — if there’s one — then out I bow
Not all achieve their dreams — but no harm, no foul
As long as one can still have fun
I cave! I cave!
When no one’s looking, I pile linens, shape a cool enclave!
I bend over barrels, get the job done
Huh! My sole is sold
But now, look at me, I fold!
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6. |
I Fold (Reprise)
00:59
|
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It just goes to show
You get what you’re owed
If you do as told! I fold!
The guests may come and go
(Move it, kid!)
But this life is all I know
I’m settled down. Just me 'n Cass
And dirty towels are all that last
And when this cruiser’s nothing but a rusted pile of bolts and nuts
Well, maybe then I’ll start anew and do more things I want to do
But 'til that day - I fold!
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7. |
A Decent Descent (Score)
00:24
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8. |
Big Bad Bhatt
01:38
|
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We space-drifters often tell stories
Of aliens, goblins, and ghosts
And legends have ways of dispersing
Though some are space bunk - I’d say most
But the guests on this boat remain clueless
And so, it seems now, do you too
Well, the scariest monster to dwell in the stars
Is quite real. And she’s here. Ohh, mon dieu!
The widow to a thousand grooms
She murdered as they begged
They say that she came from the womb
With hook and peggy-leg
The terror of the void of space
A miracle you saw her face
And lived to tale the tell
The pirate straight from hell
Big Bad Bhatt!
The war-folk tribes of Albaway
Who mine the spice melande
Fell to her sword, and to this day
No meal of hers goes bland
She slew the sainted star of Blett
Ransacked the planet Gurn
Visits pet and candy stores
Just to watch ‘em burn!
A nightmare in a captain’s frock!
Reep reep reep reep, wok wok wok!
She seemed all right to me
Could she really be?
Big Bad Bhatt!
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9. |
Old Man River
00:25
|
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10. |
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11. |
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Ol’ Blue Eyes and Davis, Jr
You’d not ask to babysit
We’re trying to keep in tune, you’re
Well, frankly, you’re wrecking it
The sea of stars outside can’t match
The blinding flare of our flair
We got pizazz and panache, ‘natch
Just keep the child over there
No place for a kid
Here in the galley, this is sin valley
She’ll flip her lid
There’s so much pressure to perform
We need the space to break the norm
Geniuses need space to smooch and suck face
No place for a kid!
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12. |
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We work hard and we play much harder
The evenings, they get real wild
And after hours, out come play cards
No worse place to bring a child
Two drinks in and two hands down, I
I take off me undershirt
And sorry if bad this sound
My bare bottom cause eyes to hurt
No place for a kid!
We needs the freedom
To cash chips and eat ‘em
Our bodies unhid!
Downstair’s a sticky sweaty mess
When the shift ends, we must undress
It’s eighteen and plus here
We drink and we cuss here
No place for a kid!
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13. |
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For little ones, eatin' just right
Build character, strengthen bone
Ingredient budget's so tight
Can't pay for it on my own
I know what you're thinkin' — quit, nyaw!
These ain't scraps from yesterday
Trash don't go in jambalaya
You can't prove it anyway
No place for a kid!
A well-balanced diet
Well, that would deny it
Not sayin' I did
So maybe once or twice I cheat
Reuse the bites folks didn't eat
Not like it's a crime now
To save money, time, now
No place for a kid!
Take dogs and cats, oil and water
Toothpaste and orange - these don’t mix
Put children up in front of pirates
Them kiddies get eighty-sixed
A babby girl about as safe here
As beignets on Fat Tuesday
Keep her far from that buccaneer
Or her head gon be on display
No place for a kid!
The first chance you see, boy
Set that thing free, boy
Get yourself rid!
I bet her folks are worried sick.
And if you’re not, you’re awfully thick
Keep the girl hidden, avoid fate unbidden
This place ain’t for kids!
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14. |
Heck's Story (Score)
01:21
|
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15. |
||||
No place for a kid
When mommy’s negoshy—
--atin’ then, oh
She wants you off-grid
'Cause things can happen mid-parley
You'll stay safe if you stay away
I’ll always return, son
When meetings adjourn, hon
No place for a kid
|
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16. |
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There’s life in the old girl yet!
There’s patches of fur missing, but count them ribs and see
Blind and arthritic but she’ll outlive you and me!
Her milk is more like dust now!
Her age I plum forget!
But there’s life in the old girl yet!
Ignore the lolling tongue among the wheezin' and the stink
Only got one lung left and her blinking's outta sync
Hear that knocking? That's the reaper!
But I'll keep her and his debt!
Yes there's life in the old girl-
Fight in the old girl-
Bite in the old girl-
Might in the old girl-
Life in the old girl yet!
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17. |
That Goat
03:12
|
|||
Far beyond these mildewed halls and walls of asbestos
In galaxies untold I basked in glory
Trained fearsome crews, won treasures fair, and conquered every foe
Every culture cowered at my story
In all my years, I’ve never been so low to acquiesce
I’ve feasted and I’ve dined, my prize beside me
But here I sink and slum like swine as I had never guessed
The only thing I want in life — denied me
But I will rise
My dreams realized
That goat!
That morsel I desire
I’m gonna eat that goat
Roast it, spit on fire!
That goat!
I’m gonna lick the bones clean
For the freedom to be me
I’ve made up my mind
I’m gonna eat that goat!
And I will rise
My dreams realized
That goat!
I’m gonna eat that goat
Reclaim my pride
Don’t care if it’s basted or fried!
And that goat!
I’m gonna eat that goat
When hunger calls
For protein, for honor, for all!
That goat!
I’m gonna eat that goat.
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18. |
A Fresh Pair (Medley)
03:10
|
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I didn’t know what I was getting into
But I threw caution to the wind right when I met you
I found you all alone, you looked so helpless
You said, “I need a partner,” and I said, “whelp, let’s”
It’s all so very strange,
How quickly things can change!
And you changed me!
I’ve changed you!
There’s nothing that either one of us can do
Oh, so helpless!
That goat!
Hardly skin and bones
Tasty still, that goat!
I want her for my own.
I can’t ever be the same
And it’s only you to blame
There’s life in this old girl yet!
Not giving up so easy, there’s still a beast to slay!
And you changed me! I'm changed now!
Kinda wanna change back but I don't know how
Oh, forgive me!
This broad is unstoppable
The Slugger can’t elude me, keep holding me at bay!
I fold! I fold!
I surrender, just don’t eat me!
First Cap, now you? That’s cold
My bloodlust ain’t relenting
Upon revenge, I’m set!
Yes, there’s life in this old girl yet!
But change, it’s for the best, chere
Take you and leave the rest, there
This calls for a fresh pair!
Life in the old girl yet!
That goat!
I fold! Fold! Fold!
|
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19. |
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20. |
||||
We set sail for vacation
Might never get to leave
A pirate’s life, authentic-like
It’s Stars Afar for me
So check in with the office
Say, “go on without me!”
We’re outlaws now, to Bhatt we bow
It’s Stars Afar… for me
|
||||
21. |
What Cap Would Do
04:00
|
|||
It’s just allergic reaction or anaphylactic shock
We’ll march you to the Captain, have a rational talk
A big misunderstanding. Things will be okay
We’ll just tell her what happened
I know what she’ll say; she’ll say:
Oh, thank you Heck, you clever kid
For bringing me The Slugger
I’m your best friend
For what you did
I’m norm’ly not a hugger!
No problem, Cap, why, that’s my job!
I’m glad you’re seein’ reason
Now hold it down so I can lob
Its head off or face treason!
Is that what Cap would do?
Gosh, I sure hope not
If that’s what cap would do,
I’ll give this more thought
A little girl? Alone and lost?
Why, son, that’s such a shame
You’re pretty much a hero, hoss
Who is she? What’s her name?
I knew you’d treat her good!
Of course, I’ll hook her up
By which I mean I’ll take her hand
And pirate-ize the pup!
There’s no place for a kid on The Apogee
No space in my heart for mercy
But the blame lies on you who brought her to me
When the kid walks the space-plank, sir, you see?
Is that what cap would do?
Probably, I guess
If that’s what cap would do
Maybe don’t confess?
Mom! Help me!
Mommy, please, tell me now
What would you do?
What do you think?
Should I turn my friend in?
Lie to my boss?
Or some other third thing?
It’s up to me to decide
Who you are, or could be
And you’re not a monster
Why, you’re only Ani
I know what Cap would do
Fight you nail and tooth
So here’s what I will do:
Hide you and the truth
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||||
22. |
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23. |
Get Creative
02:19
|
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When y'all get lemons outta life
And make y'all's lemonade
Life’ll prob’ly drink it up
And brother, you been played
But if y'all's cup is empty
And y'all's kitchen is, too
Things is never hopeless
Here’s whatcha’ gotta do:
Get creative!
Don’t look at things the same
Where you might see old potpourri
I see edda-mame!
Get creative!
Don’t a-fear to innovate
A waste what’s in that waste-ey bin
Let’s put it on that plate!
The best kinda recipe
Is one that’s for disaster
Necessity, the momma of
Invention – she’s a master!
Get creative!
When some goon is on your tail
Don’t worry ‘bout him finding out
Just warp his sense of smell!
Get creative!
Work around the obstacles
An hour-old martini
Freezes up just fine for popsicles
Get creative!
Fix it quick and stop the gap
A little innovation
And old Luzz won’t yap!
|
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24. |
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25. |
A Fresh Pair (Reprise)
02:28
|
|||
I didn’t know what I was getting into
But I threw caution to the wind right when I met you!
I found you all alone, you looked so helpless
You said, “I need a partner,” and I said, “whelp, let’s”
It’s all so very strange,
How quickly things can change!
And you changed me!
I’ve changed you!
There’s nothing that either one of us can do
Oh, so helpless!
I can’t ever be the same!
And it’s only you to blame
And you changed me!
I’m changed now-
|
||||
26. |
What Cap Does
02:11
|
|||
I know what you’re thinkin’
This must be quite a shock
Let’s all sit down together, have a rational talk
A big misunderstanding. Things will be okay
Let me tell you what happened before you have your say!
Don't say...
This whole time — under my nose
You’ve kept me from The Slugger?
(Not under, no
More to the side)
Well, now you’ll pay for what you did
You sneaky little bugger
(Take me, not her
It’s me who lied)
Relinquish me my just reward
And hand the girl to me, boy
(You know I can’t
She’s just a kid)
A classic impasse; draw your sword
And know this brings me no joy
So this is what you do
To one you’d call a friend?
(I’m still your friend!)
Well, I play dirty, too
And now we reach the end
I thought you understood
Saw me as I am!
(I see you now, but look at me!)
Thought I’d found an ally at last
But you’re just like the rest
It’s all been a sham
(It’s not too late - don't hurt Ani!)
Now hold still, give her here. I'll make this fast!
|
||||
27. |
What Cap Does (Reprise)
00:12
|
|||
Cap, what have you done?
Were you there that day?
When mom’s ship went down
Did you clear the way?
|
||||
28. |
Aw, Heck
03:22
|
|||
I hear sometimes you gotta take
Some bad to get the good
“Sometimes” is underselling it
It’s more like “always,” dude
Bad things can happen and they do
No reason, most the time
But one bad thing, it gave me you
There’s beauty in the grime
Brush your shoulders, shrug ‘em and say, “aw, heck!”
Save today’s problems for day-after-next
You can waylay your woes with a toothy smile
Thumb your nose at all those who say you’re in denial
The world is your oyster, and you’re just a bitty speck!
Life’s tough, but aw, heck
My ship’s a clunker, it’s falling apart. Aw, heck
My life, reputation and vessel are wrecked
But on this side of torture, think I found a friend
At least I’m not alone, though the suff’ring won't end
We’ll keep our chins up – avoid the rats below deck!
It’s rough, but aw, heck
We orbit, we spiral slowly
Toward a pit of most dim despair
But together we’re not so lowly!
And who knows what we’ll find down there?
The universe owes us nothing
Especially not an excuse
Life’s nothing if it’s not a tough thing!
We won’t fold. We won’t cave. We refuse!
We’re out of food. Nearly out of air
Aw, heck!
Low fuel. Is that scurvy right there on your neck?
Aw, heck!
We’ll never give in to our grief or malaise
If you squint just right, a row of F’s look like straight A’s
Hell may be below us
But it’s heck above deck!
When the thunderstorm blots out the sun
Hell may be below us
But it’s heck above deck!
Just embrace it and start having fun!
Hell may be below us
But it’s heck above deck!
Aw, heck!
|
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29. |
Stars Afar (Dirge)
00:32
|
|||
They told me it'd be easy
A month of two or three
Negotiate a great pay rate said Stars Afar to me
That's it, I quit
On you, I spit
Want stars so far from me
|
||||
30. |
Curtain Call (Score)
02:20
|
Know No Stranger Indianapolis, Indiana
Know No Songs is Know No Stranger's hub for Know No Stranger's songs.
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